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Who's Main Tank
By Grami
Featuring Grami,Yatsu


With apologies to Abbott and Costello

Grami: Alright, now whaddya want?
Yatsu: Now look, I'm Leading this Raid. I gotta know the raiders’ names. Do you know the guys' names?
Grami: Oh sure.
Yatsu: So you go ahead and tell me some of their names.
Grami: Well, I'll introduce you to the boys. You know sometimes nowadays they choose peculiar names.
Yatsu: You mean funny names.
Grami: Nicknames, pet names, like Ihealz Unoob -
Yatsu: His brother Ikillz -
Grami: Ikillz Unoob -
Yatsu: And their cousin!
Grami: Who's that?
Yatsu: Pwned!
Grami: Pwned, huh? Now let's see. We have on the melee - we have Who's Main Tank, What's Off Tank, I Don't Know's DPS.
Yatsu: That's what I wanna find out.
Grami: I say Who's Main Tank, What's Off Tank, I Don't Know's DPS -
Yatsu: You know the fellows' names?
Grami: Certainly!
Yatsu: Well then who's Main Tank?
Grami: Yes!
Yatsu: I mean the fellow's name!
Grami: Who!
Yatsu: The guy Main Tank!
Grami: Who!
Yatsu: The Main Tank!
Grami: Who!
Yatsu: The guy playing Main Tank!
Grami: Who is Main Tank!
Yatsu: Now whaddya askin' me for?
Grami: I'm telling you Who is Main Tank.
Yatsu: Well, I'm asking YOU who's Main Tank!
Grami: That's the player's name.
Yatsu: That's who's name?
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: Well go ahead and tell me.
Grami: Who.
Yatsu: The player who is Main Tank.
Grami: Who!
Yatsu: The Main Tank.
Grami: Who is Main Tank!
Yatsu: Have you got a armoury link for the Main Tank?
Grami: Absolutely.
Yatsu: Who do you put in the search?
Grami: Well, naturally!
Yatsu: When you give DPKs for the Main Tank every raid, who gets the points?
Grami: Every point. Why not? The man's entitled to it.
Yatsu: Who is?
Grami: Yes. Sometimes his alt gets them.
Yatsu: Who's alt?
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: All I'm tryin' to find out is what's the guy's name doing the Main Tank role.
Grami: Oh, no - wait a minute, don't switch 'em around. What is Off Tank.
Yatsu: I'm not askin' you who's Off Tank.
Grami: Who is Main Tank.
Yatsu: I don't know.
Grami: He's on DPS - now we're not talkin' 'bout him.
Yatsu: Now, how did I get to DPS?
Grami: You mentioned his name!
Yatsu: If I mentioned the DPS player’s name, who did I say is on DPS?
Grami: No - Who's Main Tank.
Yatsu: Never mind Main Tank - I wanna know what's the guy's name on DPS.
Grami: No - What's Off Tank.
Yatsu: I'm not askin' you who's Off Tank.
Grami: Who's Main Tank.
Yatsu: I don't know.
Grami: He's DPS.
Yatsu: Aaah! Would you please stay on DPS and don't go off it?
Grami: What was it you wanted?
Yatsu: Now who's playin' DPS?
Grami: Now why do you insist on putting Who on DPS?
Yatsu: Why? Who am I putting on it?
Grami: Yes. But we don't want him there.
Yatsu: What's the guy's name on DPS?
Grami: What is the Off Tank.
Yatsu: I'm not askin' you who's Off Tank.
Grami: Who's Main Tank.
Yatsu: I don't know.
Grami & :Yatsu: DPS!
Yatsu: You got some healers?
Grami: Oh yes!
Yatsu: The Main Healer's name?
Grami: Why.
Yatsu: I don't know, I just thought I'd ask you.
Grami: Well, I just thought I'd tell you.
Yatsu: Alright, then tell me who's playin' Main Healer.
Grami: Who is playing Mai-
Yatsu: STAY OUTTA THE MELEE! I wanna know what's the Main Healer's name.
Grami: What's Off Tank.
Yatsu: I'm not askin' you who's Off Tank.
Grami: Who's Main Tank.
Yatsu: I don't know.
Grami & Yatsu: DPS!
Yatsu: The Main Healer's name?
Grami: Why.
Yatsu: Because!
Grami: Oh, he's Spot Healer.
Yatsu: Look, you gotta CCer on this raid?
Grami: Now wouldn't this be a fine raid without a CCer.
Yatsu: The CCer's name.
Grami: Tomorrow.
Yatsu: You don't wanna tell me today?
Grami: I'm tellin' you now.
Yatsu: Then go ahead.
Grami: Tomorrow.
Yatsu: What time?
Grami: What time what?
Yatsu: What time tomorrow are you going to tell me who's playing the CCer?
Grami: Now listen. Who is not the CCer. Who is Main -
Yatsu: I'll break your arm if you say Who's Main Tank. I wanna know what's the CCer's name.
Grami: What's Off Tank.
Yatsu: I don't know.
Grami & Yatsu: DPS!
Yatsu: You got a Puller?
Grami: Oh, absolutely.
Yatsu: The Puller's name.
Grami: Today.
Yatsu: Today. And Tomorrow's is the CCer.
Grami: Now you've got it.
Yatsu: All we've got is a couple of days on the Raid.
Grami: Well, I can't help that.
Yatsu: Well, I'm a Puller too.
Grami: I know that.
Yatsu: Now suppose that I'm Pulling, Tomorrow's CCing on my raid and the pull is ready.
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: Tomorrow will CC the Adds. When it is time to pull, me being a Puller, I wanna pull and not get agro . So I Misdirect the mob and give the agro to who?
Grami: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
Yatsu: I don't even know what I'm talkin' about!
Grami: Well, that's all you have to do.
Yatsu: Is to Misdirect the agro to Main Tank.
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: Now who's got it?
Grami: Naturally!
Yatsu: If I give the agro to Main Tank, somebody's gotta aggro it. Now who aggros it?
Grami: Naturally!
Yatsu: Who aggros it?
Grami: Naturally.
Yatsu: Who?
Grami: Naturally!
Yatsu: Naturally.
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: So I Misdirect the agro and give it to Naturally.
Grami: NO, NO, NO! You Misdirect the agro to the Main Tank and Who gets it?
Yatsu: Naturally.
Grami: That's right. There we go.
Yatsu: So I Misdirect the agro and I give it to Naturally.
Grami: You don't!
Yatsu: I give it to who?
Grami: Naturally.
Yatsu: THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!
Grami: You're not saying it that way.
Yatsu: I said I give the agro to Naturally.
Grami: You don't - you give the agro to Who?
Yatsu: Naturally!
Grami: Well, say that!
Yatsu: THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING! I give the agro to who?
Grami: Naturally.
Yatsu: Ask me.
Grami: You give the agro to Who?
Yatsu: Naturally.
Grami: That's it.
Yatsu: SAME AS YOU!! I give the agro to the Main Tank and who gets it?
Grami: Naturally!
Yatsu: Who has it?
Grami: Naturally!
Yatsu: HE BETTER HAVE IT! I throw the agro to Main Tank. Whoever it is grabs agro while What picks up the add and holds it. Who holds the main mob while I don’t know does DPS. Tomorrow CC’s the other add. Main target is dead, Who switches to What’s target while I don’t know DPSs. Finally Tomorrow stops CC and I don’t know does DPS while Who and What help out, all mobs dead.
Grami: Yes.
Yatsu: Next Pull – It goes bad. Why? I don't know. Who is dead and I don't give a darn!
Grami: What was that?
Yatsu: I said I don't give a darn!
Grami: Oh, that's our Master Looter.

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